Motherhood Discipleshipfeatured

Today, I am going to expound on how discipleship relates to motherhood and what that means for the lives of Christian women. I have unofficially coined the term “motherhood discipleship” for this dynamic.  

Since we have Christ living in us, we are not under law (Galatians 4, Isaiah 54:1). As free women, we have a duty to submit ourselves unto the Lord as He is the head of not only our family, but our very lives. So, we listen to the call of the Great Commission, which echoes the first command given to the first husband and wife— “Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth and subdue it.” Similarly, we make disciples who become children of God. 

This is a command for all people and requires a wifely submission to our Husband, Jesus, to care for His children, who are our own children. This is why the Lord tells us to “enlarge the place of your tent” (Isaiah 54:2a). He’s telling us to prepare for children. Spiritual children. So, the process of preparing for and caring for spiritual offspring is what I’d like to call “motherhood discipleship”, as I see no more fitting description for our task as the Bride of Christ. With that established, let’s determine who our spiritual children are. 

Upon entering the kingdom of God, a believer enters a new reality, much like how a baby in the womb who once knew only darkness is birthed into a new world of light and color and movement. Naturally, they’re overwhelmed by their new reality. Part of the reason why we believers acted as though everything became new after rebirth is because everything was new to us. Even as we mature, we’re still in a process of renewal to cut off the “dead man” parts of ourselves, which makes room for Spirit-filled components. The difference between an adult and a child in the Spirit is that older Christians have passed certain thresholds that newer Christians haven’t. This is the process of spiritual growth and maturity.  

When a child is left alone for a long time, we call that neglect—or abuse. This can happen to spiritual children. Believers, like babies, need care. They need quality time with loved ones. They need space to learn the things they’ve been taught, they need both gentle and stern guidance, they need room to make mistakes, they need some respect and trust, they need play. As free women, we need to consider, what is the fullness of being motherly disciplers of spiritual children? 

It means discipleship that doesn’t feel particularly heroic. It’s not always burning the midnight oil to reach into someone’s emotional quagmire to help with a pornography addiction or an abusive boyfriend (although these are very good things!). Motherly discipleship is also comparable to playing with dolls and potty training. It’s holding our tongue, giving minor corrections, validating people, and perhaps most importantly, it’s spending quality time with them. It’s simply dwelling with one another through all walks of life, through thick and thin. It can be great—just like mothering can be great. But what about when it becomes hard to navigate? Let’s look at Scripture’s wisdom on how to dwell together. 

First, “Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others” (Philippians 2:3-4). The word “nothing” isn’t hyperbole here. I honestly believe the word “nothing” means “nothing.” But how do we know we’re avoiding selfish ambition? We compare our actions with Scripture, which will test our genuineness and conscience (1 Peter 3:15-16, Hebrews 13:18, 1 Corinthians 4). This test is completed by inspecting our fruitfulness (Matthew 7:18, Galatians 5:22-23). We may want to ask a few questions to check our hearts as we try to love. Here’s some suggestions: 

• Am I acting in love or selfish ambition toward this person? 
• Am I looking only to my own interests and not the interests of others? 
• What does God’s word tell me about my conduct?
• Am I ignoring my conscience? 
• Am I acting in faith that God will give me what I need to love?
• What fruits are my actions producing? 

For those indwelt by the Holy Spirit, we have the power to love others the way we are called to through faith. We’re called to love even when it makes us a bit uncomfortable. Most of us know this, but I want to remind you that it isn’t always an act of dire self-sacrifice. For some, it may look like going on a camping trip with members of your community group who invited you to Itasca…even though you hate camping. For others, it may be waking up early or staying up later to socialize with a friend whose schedule fits awkwardly with yours. Or it could be something mundane. 

These are opportunities to love and cherish spiritual children around us. If we slow down enough to act on these opportunities, they can be greatly rewarding and sanctifying. Actions like these contribute to the unity of the church, making us a church that doesn’t shy from members of their own Body. God is vast—His image bearers and newborns are people to be seen for who they are. Their personalities and talents are small yet precious reflections of who He is. A good mother is one who is laughing alongside her child in the good times and sympathizing with her child in trial. She’s in the dining room doing dishes while her daughter does homework at the table, ready to help if needed. She’s present during the high times of her child’s life, not only there to pick up the pieces during lows. She sympathizes. 

Why? This is how our Lord treats us. Our Savior is beside us in our joys. He doesn’t scoff at us for bawling over a skinned knee. He has no guardedness when we cry out to Him, no matter why we cry. “For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace that we may receive mercy and find grace in time of need” (Hebrews 4:15-16). This is the perfect display of God’s tender heart toward us; it’s a comfort for spiritual mothers and children alike. 

Free women, we make the effort to accompany those weaker in faith even when it seems insignificant because we have been loved by our Husband who sympathizes with us and never treats a moment with us as insignificant. For this reason, we can step up to the task of loving others when it’s not only hard but downright tedious and dull—God knows how to love them, and He knows how to open our eyes to see all spiritual children through His eyes. And every time we fail to love as Christ does, we may look to Jesus in all He has done and continues to do for us. He gives us strength to step confidently toward the throne of grace so we may continue our race. 

We can dwell together in full unity as mothers and daughters. We will bring more children into our fold. However, this takes more than severe damage control, which is what I find the nature of most discipleship relationships to be. 

Christians commonly evangelize to nonbelievers through doing life with them. We hang out and patiently wait for spiritual conversations. Around nonbelievers, we understand the importance of their felt needs to be enjoyed and not just seen as someone for us to save. This kind of relationship is especially prominent with our biological families—it’s just how family is. Yet, with believers, this isn’t always the case. We meet exclusively for the purpose of diving into deep heart issues and sideline the familial bond of existing together in regular life. We don’t lose these needs upon rebirth; in fact, I’d argue they grow stronger upon rebirth. We need our true family. It’s a strange world to live in when a mentor knows your deepest griefs and sins but has no idea what you’re like on the regular. Mothers, Children, let’s grasp the closeness appointed for us. 

My hope is to open your eyes to the importance of dwelling together during times that seem inconsequential—the way family does. No time is inconsequential; the work of being a woman who knows her disciples on good days and bad days is dazzlingly beautiful in the eyes of God. Motherhood discipleship is a calling to us all. When made manifest, it’s our obligation to cherish the “little ones” around us. Discipleship is our gentle, motherly work, Ladies. By it, we’re adorned in our heart with imperishable beauty that is unfathomably precious in God’s sight. I encourage you to discuss with your sisters in Christ to see who it is you pour into, who pours into you, and how you might be able to grow into the maturity of motherly love toward the spiritual children in your circle of influence.